A somewhat personal post but please dont read anything into it- I just need a little rant!
Today (if things had gone my way and common sense and patience prevailed), I would have been flying to Japan.
In fact, as of this posting, i would be about 4 hours away from Tokyo.
And I feel quite crappy about that fact.
Given the term I have had, it would have been great to just get away and go back to the country I feel a great affinity with. Not that I wont enjoy spending time with my family but up until the tsunami and earthquake (and subsequent nuclear reactor meltdown), everything was hinging on this trip: it was keeping me going. When the plug was pulled very quickly after the triple disaster (even when the Australian gov't and Australian Nuclear Agency was saying it was safe), things just seemed to take a nose dive for me. Pulling double duty at work as the other member of my department left didnt help as I have had and will continue to for the next month or so, do everything including all of the reports from K-10 and all the marking from 7-10 whilst preparing for an inspection in the 3rd week of term, but things just have not been fun, especially for the second half of the last term (some people really shit me with their petty ways and the desire to intimidate people they think are 'beneath' them) and Im just really thinking about things I probably shouldnt be thinking about-Lisa's death a couple of weeks back and Kery's health issues really got me thinking about stuff: nothing too serious but its just not where I want my head to be at the moment and todays lack of lift off was the icing on the cake!
Just finished watching Rock Star on tele and it features my all time favourite song 'Colorful' by the Verve Pipe which has again rattled me a little for some reason- maybe its the lack of sleep or just my paranoia…either way, I had to post something to get it off my chest.
Now to leave you with the lyrics so I can be even more emo……. but it is a beautiful song!
COLORFUL-The Verve Pipe
The show is over close the story book
They'll be no encore
And all the random hands that I have shook
Well they're, reaching for the door
I watch their backs as they leave single file
But you stood stubborn, cheering all the while
I know I can be colorful
I know I can be gray
But I know this loser's living fortunate
Cause I know, you will love me either way
Most were being good for goodness sake
But you wouldn't pantomime
You are more beautiful when you awake
Than most are in a lifetime
Through the haze that is my memory well
You stayed for drama though you paid for a comedy and
I know I can be colorful
I know I can be gray
But I know this loser's living fortunate
Cause I know, you will love me either way
Look ahead as far as you can see it
We'll live in drama but we'll die in a comedy and
I know I can be colorful (we're living in color blind)
I know I can be gray (my colors fade away)
And I know this losers living fortunate
Cause I know, you will love me
Yes I know, you will love me
I know, you will love me
Either way